day Pete was complaining to his friend "my elbow hurts. I better
see a doctor".
friend said "Don't do that. There's a computer in the drug store
that can diagnose anything. It's quicker and cheaper than visiting a
doctor. Simply put a urine sample in the machine and it will diagnose
your problem and tell you what to do about it. It only costs .00."
figured he had nothing to lose so he filled a jar with a urine sample.
He went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample
and deposited .00. The computer started to make a weird nose and
various lights began to flash. After a brief pause, a small slip of
paper printed. It said:
have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy labor, it
will be better in two weeks.
that evening, while thinking how amazing that computer was, Pete began
to wonder if it could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed
some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his
wife and daughter. To top it off, he masterbated into the concoction.
He went back to the drug store, poured the sample into the machine and
deposited .00. The machine again made the usual noise and printed
out the following analysis:
water is hard, get a softener. Your dog has worms, get him shots. Your
daughter's using cocaine, get her into a rehab clinic. Your wife's pregnant,
it's not yours, get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your
tennis elbow will never get better!